Three crazy weeks X.x

So I didn't realize HOW crazy things would get until I went to work today.

I have a crazy schedule, but I'm also going to be making a decent amount of money (honestly, I think I could've pushed for more... :\) so I guess I won't complain. I think that having this kind of schedule made me realize that I don't want to part-time it. It's just too crazy with too much to take care of. I'd rather just work full-time at one place and call it a day.

I'm working at 3 different places and private tutoring. X.x Thankfully though, one of the places is only on Saturdays but I'm hoping to change it if I get the place I want to work at. If it all works out it all works out. If it doesn't, it doesn't. I just hope that I don't start banking everything on this one place because I could very well not get the job. I hope I do...

I'm so good at procrastinating

Interestingly enough, lately people have told me that I look really reliable and responsible and all that... is that true?

For some reason I really don't think I do (and honestly, I don't think I really am... am I?). It's interesting to see how strangers (or somewhat strangers) view me. I mean I guess I'm not completely irresponsible but I do have that side of me so I don't really know where people get "responsible" from. Hm. I suppose it's a good thing.

I think that in that sense I shall try to become what people think I am. ^^;;

I mean seriously. I'm really good at procrastinating and generally not getting things done until the last minute so I guess I think it's weird that people think otherwise. Take right now for instance. I should be lesson planning but all I really did was eat dinner and watch some Nodame Cantabile (a very good anime btw) and part of the Hana Yori Dango movie (which I've decided is going to be terrible). After watching the Korean version, I've realized that the two main characters are much better fit for their roles than the Japanese version. Dood, the Domyouji from the Japanese version looks like a Japanese Michael Jackson (at least the hair and face). And besides, I always imagined Domyouji to be tall and muscular, not skinny and effeminate -_-. At any rate, here I am still wasting more time. I think I'll at least try to get something done. ^^;;

I am indeed quite an idiot

So I just realized that two people that I have been fb friends for... enough time were not on my limited profile and they should've been.

Why? Because one is my STUDENT and I have many "incriminating" pictures of me drinking. O.M.G. I'm pretty sure he's seen them too so now it's like what do I doooooo?! (and he's probably seen my wall posts T.T) I mean in the end, I suppose it doesn't matter whether or not they know whether their teachers drink or not since it's a part of Korean culture, but it's still quite bothersome. Ugh.

The other kid is this kid that used to go to my church. He was younger and I think he used to kind of look to me for advice since I went through the whole college thing or whatever. At any rate, I think I didn't put him on my limited profile since I figured he was old enough to handle my "drinking" pictures (honestly, I don't think they're that bad....) but yeah. Bleh~

So now I'm thinking omg-how-could-I-not-have-put-them-on-my-limited-profile but at the same time, does it really matter? Gaaaaah

Oh well. It's too late now. I just hope he doesn't like pass them around to all my other students who don't have access to my pictures. X.x *sigh*~

Bored. I need to start working.

So honestly not much has been going on in my life. To the point where I'm bored with what I'm doing right now. The last three weeks have been pretty busy since family was here but I really need to find a job. I have some stuff going on for winter, but I don't have anything going on after that. If things work out right, I might just work for a couple weeks and take another month off of work. :D haha But I think I'm just being lazy. There's so much I want to do but it's the age old all-of-a-sudden-the-day-disappears thing... I don't know I think I need to stop being on the computer so much.

Meh~

College apps have stopped going anywhere but I'm going to pretend it was because I was busy with family and thankfully spend this next week really focusing on all my writing and what not. I think I'm going to eat lunch somewhere not at home because I never get anywhere if I try to eat all my meals at home.

This winter has been blissfully warm with I think a total of like 3-4 days that were truly cold. I'm thankful yet apprehensive of the cold to come. What if, just like how a month of fall there was a summer-y month, in spring, there will be one extra month of crappy winter weather? X.x I just hope this winter is really short.

That aside, I'm looking into grad school programs in Japan. For no other reason than because I want to live there. I found a program that I really liked but I honestly couldn't get any more information on it so I'm going to see if there's more info somewhere. Meh~ Logistically though, it's too expensive but apparently there are scholarships for foreigners in Japan. I heard this from a guy who studied in Japan like 20 years ago though so... I think I need to do my own research. X.x haha

There isn't much else going on in my life. I want to leave home and have been looking for one-room places in a decent location but so far, I haven't found anything decent. X.x I mean the cheapest places are also so far off the beaten track (though there seems to be a decent number of places by Seoul University... I suppose if I end up going to grad school there, I should find housing around there...). But apparently that neighborhood used to be the slums... so um... yeah.

BLAH. I'm bored with myself and the things going on right now. I need to find something interesting to do. I think I'm going to pick up scrapbooking again. I have like 20 scrapbooks to work on.

Bored even though I shouldn't be

I don't know why but I feel like staying up tonight. I don't know why I go through these random phases where I just stay up (could it be that cup of vending machine coffee that I drank at like... 7pm? Sometimes, I surprise myself with how low my caffeine tolerance) but here I am again at 2:30 in the morning. Staring at my computer screen trying not to waste time on facebook.

But! I have been setting up my beautifully awesome desktop. Only thing that kinda really sux is that the internet doesn't really work on that computer. X.x So um... yeah it kinda defeats the purpose of having a desktop in my room (sorta). I think I'm going to move the wireless router so I get better reception in my room.

Ok now I'm boring myself.

I guess I could talk about my job situation. Honestly, I've lost motivation to work. I honestly, just want to roll around and scrape by with my one tutoring class a week. It's really nice. But I don't have any money now so I really do need to start working. I've half-assedly been searching and I have a 4 week temp job with my old workplace in a week so that'll be good. I dunno I've just been so apathetic lately. MEH! I blame it on visiting family. We're doing too many cool things together hehe~

Like today, we went to this Christmas concert. It was the Seoul Choir or something (I dunno how to translate it) but honestly, they weren't very good. I think that I've started to become a little pretentious about these things (which is terrible) but I just caught little things here and there that just made me realize I don't ever want to see this group perform again. Like the concertmaster had a solo - for something like away in a manger or some random carol and he just sounded awkward. He had another solo during the encore (which honestly there shouldn't have been one...) and he played so much better! I don't know what was going on but then there was also an organ and when it first was playing it was ridiculously loud. Don't they like figure all that stuff out before the concert? For some reason I got the sense that they didn't practice as much as they normally would've because the music they were playing was easier and it shows that there's a lack of professionalism with this orchestra. The choir was fine I thought though the altos could've been a little louder (but I think it's because I'm used to hearing the altos since I sing alto at church...). I dunno, I think I'm being too critical but I mean I general don't pick up on too many of these things but there was a lot for this concert (I could go on but I won't). Otherwise, I'd have to say the medley that they chose really brought out the brass section (they were pretty good) and the first flutist was really good. OO and the violas had a mini "solo" so that was really cool. Also, the percussion section definitely had some cool parts and they had a harp for one of the medleys. I like harps. :D

I still think Handel's Messiah sounds better with a full orchestra and choir (even though it wasn't originally written for one) because of the nature of the piece. Meh. Still a decent performance, I thought.

Meh.

Ok I'm still bored. I'm going to go to bed or watch some anime or something.

Update on the "list of things I want to accomplish while I'm not working"

So I created this list that I told myself I would accomplish while rolling around and not doing anything:

1. Study for the GRE

- do practice problems for the Literature in English Subject test

- do practice problems for the Regular GRE

- memorize vocab

2. Read - though this will mainly be on the subway, I hope to read a lot

3. Write

- work on my book

- fix my papers to send out to my professors

4. Sleep regularly

- I have so many plans to have a regular schedule but I have to come up with a set schedule of things I want to accomplish by the end of the day. Hopefully this will work out.

5. Work out

- Running and muay thai. Hopefully a combination of the two

6. See Seoul

- Hopefully while I try to stake out different places to study, I'll be able to see Seoul. I plan on going hiking and studying at the top of a hill in a pagoda. Maybe I'll even pack a lunch... heeeee

Did I actually accomplish all this?

Honestly more or less yes. However, I was planning on doing this on a daily basis. Did this happen? No. -______-

I shall slowly but surely try to get back into the swing of things. I still want to do my pagoda thing. And I haven't written as much as I should. The writing process is so painful for me because I can't sit still and stare at a screen for too long unless I'm watching anime. Hm. Meh~

Being a Christian is complex precisely because finding true happiness is complex and ever-changing. Such is also the path to becoming a Christian - not in the sense of acting as 'Christians' do today, but becoming a true believer in God and in our salvation through Jesus.