Actually, it's not that I forgot, it's that I haven't felt like I've had anything worthwhile to say that isn't deeply entrenched in any kind of literary/narrative theory that I'm up to my ears in.
To trying to keep in line with the more ideological aspects of this blog (rather than the personal), I keep thinking that I've stifled myself in graduate school.
In some ways, graduate school has taught me to write in a certain rhetorical style that I may not be altogether comfortable. I think this kind of training is good, but I think that in trying to learn the foundations of good scholarship, my thoughts and what I like to think of as my creativity have become stifled.
It's an odd place to be right now.
In trying to become someone that I aspire to be, I think I've forgotten who I am at my core.
I write to process, and I process (life) to write.
Amidst all my struggle, I've forgotten why I do this at all. To write, explore, and most of all, to meander. I love the meandering.
Another word comes to mind: wanderlust. Do I still have the spirit to travel? The spirit of adventure? I do and I don't. I think the uncharted territory for me has become the habits I need to break in order to succeed in this thing called graduate school. It's over for now, but I realize in all of this struggle, it's still something I want to do.
I see that glimmer, and I want more of it. I want to contribute and grow thoughts that influence society. It's so crazy how influential all the things I study are.
Gotta do what I feel like I've been meant to do. Gotta take steps to become the person I aspire to be.
Excellence doesn't happen overnight. Excellence is habit. Let's go and be good (I got the inspiration from the following video):
