I have found an article whose content I find to be fascinating. Often times, these academic articles are so dull compared to the novel or work that it strives to analyze that obligation dictates my perusal of them. However, I think that perhaps I am starting to understand better the enjoyment behind research and what it means to be an academe.
How do I know this?
I begrudged an interruption by my dad from the world I was in while reading the article.
I dive into language and learning and as I lose myself in that world, I find small pleasures in the knowledge that is imparted to me. This is perhaps another small reminder of why I am here, doing what I do.
And at the same time, a small, but noticeable sign of my progress (growth?) as a graduate student! Oh the joys of the little things in life...
Monday, December 8, 2014
Friday, December 5, 2014
Reading and yet more reading
What is it about other people's thoughts, their theories, their way of thinking that is so hard for me to absorb? What is it they are trying to say and why is it so hard for me to follow?
Narration and narratives are easy. There is a story to tell and you take it apart based on the way the author chooses to portray a story. What, of life, did the author choose to show as important? Why did the author choose to focus on the psychology of the characters rather than the action of the plot? Such things are easy to decipher.
We enter the realm of the philosophy or the theory behind the writing and suddenly, I feel like I hit a wall.
Joseph Conrad and Henry James. Their driving philosophies should render their work more accessible. Yet their very philosophies is where I fail. To follow people through the logic of their thoughts isn't difficult yet something is stopping understanding.
Perhaps it's just time for me to go to bed. Bah.
Narration and narratives are easy. There is a story to tell and you take it apart based on the way the author chooses to portray a story. What, of life, did the author choose to show as important? Why did the author choose to focus on the psychology of the characters rather than the action of the plot? Such things are easy to decipher.
We enter the realm of the philosophy or the theory behind the writing and suddenly, I feel like I hit a wall.
Joseph Conrad and Henry James. Their driving philosophies should render their work more accessible. Yet their very philosophies is where I fail. To follow people through the logic of their thoughts isn't difficult yet something is stopping understanding.
Perhaps it's just time for me to go to bed. Bah.
Sunday, November 30, 2014
Grace, mercy, and justice
Justice: getting what you deserve
Mercy: not getting what you deserve
Grace: getting what you don't deserve
This was brought up today in the Bible study class I attended today and I really like thinking about this. There's two ways to think about this - in terms of others, and then in terms of oneself.
Justice - everyone should get what they deserve. If a person does something wrong, they should be punished for it. That's why the term poetic justice exists in literature. We watch a movie or read a book, expecting that the bad will come to justice, or at least hoping that they will. Even in real life, we hope that there is justice in our daily lives and fight for it (well, most people do, or at least in what people envision as the ideal, everyone will fight for what is believed to be just).
Now let's personalize this. If you commit a wrong, do you want justice? Most likely, you will want mercy.
Mercy - every time someone does something wrong, they want mercy. They want to be the exception to the rule. Why? Because it sucks to have to deal with the consequences of one's actions. Of course the ideal is if one does not do anything wrong or commit that wrong to begin with. However, no one is perfect and everyone has their faults, intentional or not. So then, the one time that one commits a wrong, does it seem fair to have to deal with those consequences? Of course here, most people understand human's imperfections and will say that it is just to be merciful.
However, justice in its purest form would be that everyone must deal with the consequences of their wrongs. (Oh, you could argue that such things shouldn't be so black and white, but then, where is justice in the slippery slope of mercy?)
And then there's this idea of grace. Honestly, I think most people take slight offense to the idea of grace. "Why should he (or she) get that? They don't deserve it!" Think of the criminal that gets away, some undeserving (usually we think ungrateful) child who reaps the benefits of their parents' hard work, etc. The list can be endless when we think of people who have what they don't deserve.
Again, let's personalize it for a second. You've done something bad. You deserve to be punished. Instead of being punished, someone else gets punished for you, and you get something kind of really awesome instead. That joy, I think, would be indescribable, but I think there's also a plethora of feelings that go with that. The crushing realization that you don't deserve that something, the guilt of having it, the guilt, too, that someone else had to suffer because of you, the pressure of showing the appreciation, etc. Can you full appreciate that which you got that you didn't deserve?
It's an interesting concept to roll around. Grace works in interesting ways. I mean yes, this could be in the Christian sense but I think generally speaking. I think grace in its purest form can only happen with God because when someone does something for you, they usually have some kind of expectation of getting something back (whether you live a good life or whatever). Like, if I went to jail for some punk kid who deserved it, that little brat better be working his/her ass off to make a better life for himself/herself, y'know?
Hm. I think grace would be interesting to explore by itself. This idea of grace (both with and separate from Christianity).
Mercy: not getting what you deserve
Grace: getting what you don't deserve
This was brought up today in the Bible study class I attended today and I really like thinking about this. There's two ways to think about this - in terms of others, and then in terms of oneself.
Justice - everyone should get what they deserve. If a person does something wrong, they should be punished for it. That's why the term poetic justice exists in literature. We watch a movie or read a book, expecting that the bad will come to justice, or at least hoping that they will. Even in real life, we hope that there is justice in our daily lives and fight for it (well, most people do, or at least in what people envision as the ideal, everyone will fight for what is believed to be just).
Now let's personalize this. If you commit a wrong, do you want justice? Most likely, you will want mercy.
Mercy - every time someone does something wrong, they want mercy. They want to be the exception to the rule. Why? Because it sucks to have to deal with the consequences of one's actions. Of course the ideal is if one does not do anything wrong or commit that wrong to begin with. However, no one is perfect and everyone has their faults, intentional or not. So then, the one time that one commits a wrong, does it seem fair to have to deal with those consequences? Of course here, most people understand human's imperfections and will say that it is just to be merciful.
However, justice in its purest form would be that everyone must deal with the consequences of their wrongs. (Oh, you could argue that such things shouldn't be so black and white, but then, where is justice in the slippery slope of mercy?)
And then there's this idea of grace. Honestly, I think most people take slight offense to the idea of grace. "Why should he (or she) get that? They don't deserve it!" Think of the criminal that gets away, some undeserving (usually we think ungrateful) child who reaps the benefits of their parents' hard work, etc. The list can be endless when we think of people who have what they don't deserve.
Again, let's personalize it for a second. You've done something bad. You deserve to be punished. Instead of being punished, someone else gets punished for you, and you get something kind of really awesome instead. That joy, I think, would be indescribable, but I think there's also a plethora of feelings that go with that. The crushing realization that you don't deserve that something, the guilt of having it, the guilt, too, that someone else had to suffer because of you, the pressure of showing the appreciation, etc. Can you full appreciate that which you got that you didn't deserve?
It's an interesting concept to roll around. Grace works in interesting ways. I mean yes, this could be in the Christian sense but I think generally speaking. I think grace in its purest form can only happen with God because when someone does something for you, they usually have some kind of expectation of getting something back (whether you live a good life or whatever). Like, if I went to jail for some punk kid who deserved it, that little brat better be working his/her ass off to make a better life for himself/herself, y'know?
Hm. I think grace would be interesting to explore by itself. This idea of grace (both with and separate from Christianity).
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
I'd rather be "us"
There is separation when it's you and me.
You are still you and I am still me.
When you becomes "u" and the self becomes "s"
To create us,
There is no distinction anymore of a you or me,
But a whole, complete unit that cannot be separated
Into you and me.
You are still you and I am still me.
When you becomes "u" and the self becomes "s"
To create us,
There is no distinction anymore of a you or me,
But a whole, complete unit that cannot be separated
Into you and me.
Spent pens
There is something refreshing about fully used up pens. Mind you, this is different from pens whose ink has dried out. There is a feeling of waste and a slight twinge of regret in having to dispose of them.
In throwing out these used up pens, there almost seems to be a sense of clearing out the clutter.
Perhaps I simply have too many pens.
In throwing out these used up pens, there almost seems to be a sense of clearing out the clutter.
Perhaps I simply have too many pens.
Thursday, November 13, 2014
I meander
Perhaps this is how bad habits are formed.
Perhaps this is why it takes me so long to do things.
Perhaps this is why I love both late nights and early mornings (and yet sleep trumps both if I'm ever tired).
Yet if I am relishing the moments I have as I meander through life, is that all that should matter?
The balance between meandering and taking the direct path.
I prefer to meander.
Perhaps this is why it takes me so long to do things.
Perhaps this is why I love both late nights and early mornings (and yet sleep trumps both if I'm ever tired).
Yet if I am relishing the moments I have as I meander through life, is that all that should matter?
The balance between meandering and taking the direct path.
I prefer to meander.
Friday, November 7, 2014
Dance across my heart
Things out of context seldom sound right but I like this phrase. (I suppose that's my thing right now - pretty phrases... though I feel like that's always my thing...)
Anyway, the rest of the passage was cloyingly saccharine and I didn't want to share the rest of it but I liked how those four words sounded.
I think that depending on context, it can also sound unfortunate (in that when someone dances across one's heart, that person could be playing with one's heart) but I like to think of it as a metaphorical manifestation of the way someone can come up in one's thoughts and the feeling that the thought of the person gives feels like that. They are dancing across one's heart in a beautiful and poetic way because of the happiness that stems from thinking of the person. One's heart beats a little faster, a blush becomes deeper, and a smile unwittingly plays across the lips because that person brings that kind of joy to one's heart and mind.
Hehe. *^_^*
Anyway, the rest of the passage was cloyingly saccharine and I didn't want to share the rest of it but I liked how those four words sounded.
I think that depending on context, it can also sound unfortunate (in that when someone dances across one's heart, that person could be playing with one's heart) but I like to think of it as a metaphorical manifestation of the way someone can come up in one's thoughts and the feeling that the thought of the person gives feels like that. They are dancing across one's heart in a beautiful and poetic way because of the happiness that stems from thinking of the person. One's heart beats a little faster, a blush becomes deeper, and a smile unwittingly plays across the lips because that person brings that kind of joy to one's heart and mind.
Hehe. *^_^*
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