Addiction

I might be overreacting but I think I can legitimately say that I'm unhealthily addicted to anime/TV shows and my computer. It's 3:20am and I almost finished season 4 of The Big Bang Theory. I tried to stop after two episodes and utterly failed. I don't like the series because it's too episodic but I keep watching it for some reason.

Normally this would be fine for someone who has a relatively free schedule and doesn't work regularly. However, I have a writing sample due pretty much today (I told my professor I'd send it to her) and I'm not done. T.T

So I decided to try and do something about it and looked up on google "how to defeat addiction" and the first thing that came up was how to get rid of a porn addiction. -_-;; I guess it's that bad for some people... Some of the other top search results included a facebook and myspace addiction. I didn't know that it was that bad either. What's weird is that those kinds of things palpably feel like a waste of time whereas with anime and TV shows, I can't tell that time is passing. Interestingly enough, it took the second page to get to the drug and alcohol addictions. You'd think it'd be the other way around.

I remember I was watching this show on the Discovery channel or something about this guy who was addicted to food and he made this point about saying how hard it was to get over his addiction. He made the analogy of someone telling drug addicts that they can only have small doses of the drug that they were addicted to three times a day. I mean that's hard, if not impossible for an addict to do and that's exactly what this guy would have to do because he would need to nourish his body in some way or another. This guy was so fat that people would have to come over and flip him over because he couldn't turn over in bed (and he was completely bedridden). I didn't understand what he was going through when I was watching the program but now I think I get it to a certain extent. I'm not completely dysfunctional if I'm not in front of a computer but it's pretty much all I do when I'm home (unless playing the DS counts as something else - I do do other things though! Like cook...). I have some other hobbies but a vast majority of my time is in front of the computer. This is the case with a lot of people but sometimes I have difficulty stopping. I realized all the more so when I'm stressed out (which I didn't know I got so stressed out but I think I stress a lot more frequently than I realize), which attributes to my insomnia.

At any rate, now it's time for me to stop. We'll see how it goes. ^^

All the websites I looked at were pretty useless and I always felt like addiction was just a matter of the mind (a test of willpower really) so I guess one of the best ways to go about is to just suck it up and do what it takes to stop. I think I need a better grasp on time (which I'm getting better at) and perhaps things will get better.

There was one decent website that had this list where you have to choose 3 things that your addiction really affects (God, family, work, personal hygiene, etc.) and it talked about working on improving those three things. I think that might actually help.

But my goodness The Big Bang Theory is so addictive. I wish it weren't so episodic...