The power of appearances

I was talking to two friends about this on two separate occasions and it really makes me wonder (of course being in Korea always makes me think of how I look to others... It's sad, really).

I realize it isn't simply about good-looking or bad-looking as much as it's about the atmosphere or I suppose the better word would be carriage of a person. So how the person is treated does come from one's inner workings - i.e. confidence level, personality, thoughts and the person's mood and health at the time of the exchange.

Okay so to backtrack, basically the question or the thought is this:

To what extent are people affected by how they look? What I mean is that based on how a person looks, people around them will treat them a certain way. So a cute, bubbly baby will be treated with more attention and in many ways, love and care by not necessarily their parents alone, but by strangers who meet that baby. So from a very young age, the child is treated "better." Then there's another child who is always fretful and crying. The annoying brats who cry all the time. Perhaps they will be treated with more care and attention by the care-givers, but who wants to be friends with someone like that? That affects children.

As people age, they evolve. Looks evolve and people look better or worse. There are other factors, like people getting fatter or skinnier, there's always plastic surgery, etc.

In Korea, it's really apparent on how people get treated - it's happened to me on several occasions and I somewhat disagree with the obvious favoritism. It isn't just the cute guy/girl getting better treatment, but the more positive, seemingly nicer-looking person gets better treatment, be it freebies, services or general attitude and treatment from the other party.

So then how does that affect a person? Their personality? Their reaction to people?

I mean one could argue that in the end, a person is themselves, but are they really? Do people not realize just how much they are affected by society, culture and the thoughts and opinions of people around them?

Then again, I wonder. Is it just me that feels myself getting pushed and pulled along by these things? Am I simply weak-willed and unable to find my own footing among all these influences?

I think that's why I try to make a point to be nicer to people who look mean, or leave negative impressions. Sometimes people can't help the way they look. It may or may not be an indication of who they are as a person. Sadly though, there are stereotypes and the unfortunate truth is that those stereotypes exist for a reason. A person is perceived to be sinister because somewhere, something inside has caused them to have such an expression.

In the end, I really don't know. I mean it obviously doesn't do well to judge someone based on how they look (and again, this is not based on attractiveness, but more on the impression the person leaves - and not just the first impression). At the same time, I don't think that it's entirely wrong to say that one shouldn't look at a person's carriage (I think that the argument that a person's inner workings is manifested physically isn't entirely inaccurate.).

I suppose the way to go about it would be simply to reserve judgment until proven one way or another, but I would imagine this to be nigh impossible.

Eh. In the end, I prefer to believe in the general good of people. Well, at least in the capability for people to do good. I suppose that's good enough for me.